February Photo Dump

 

Picture Ledges! Tim built these for the upstairs hall.

Brendan, 15

February Freeze!!

Boats locked in ice

Frozen Susquehanna

Max and Miles!! Cute!!

Maggie, 5. Our Princess

Furry Friends

From Catholic Vote....

SEXUALITIES OR SEXUALITY?

BY DEACON JIM RUSSELL

Okay, faithful, observant Catholics—it’s quiz time!

How many different “sexualities” are there in Catholic moral teaching?

It’s a short quiz—if you guessed “one and only one,” you are exactly right.

This basic truth, of course, is something the culture has gotten exactly wrong for decades. Claiming that “sexualities” exist is the very foundation for the massively proliferating confusion and contention over sexual morality in the last several generations. And we Catholics need to be willing to stand against ideologies that promote the existence of “sexualities,” both in the Church and in culture at-large.

It may be that some readers are somewhat confused at this point—am I being serious? Isn’t this some kind of extremist misrepresentation of Church teaching? Am I really suggesting that, for example, homosexuality isn’t a “sexuality” unto itself, just like heterosexuality? Bisexuality, transsexuality, asexuality, autosexuality, pansexuality—am I saying they really don’t exist?

Well, no—these terms exist to describe attractions and experiences that are real enough. They’re just not sexualities. Rather, they are divergent paths away fromauthentically human sexuality.

Let’s let the Church interject some clear teaching at this point, right from the Catechism of the Catholic Church. First, in Paragraph 2360, we are taught that “sexuality is ordered to the conjugal love of man and woman.” Then in Paragraph 2361, we receive an incredibly clarifying quote from Pope St. John Paul II (from “Familiaris Consortio,” 11):

“Sexuality, by means of which man and woman give themselves to one another through the acts which are proper and exclusive to spouses, is not something simply biological, but concerns the innermost being of the human person as such. It is realized in a truly human way only if it is an integral part of the love by which a man and woman commit themselves totally to one another until death.” [CCC Paragraph 3261]

How does one realize “sexuality” in a truly human way? One does so only if “sexuality” is an integral part of the “conjugal love of man and woman.” Sexuality, in its one-and-only existing and God-created reality, is ordered only to the love of man and woman that ultimately brings them to marriage.

This is why every other so-called “sexuality” expressed in culture today is something less than a fully human expression of human love—because it’s not properly ordered toward married love.

This belief is so utterly counter-cultural that even many Catholics have difficulty grasping it in its utter simplicity. Indeed, it’s pejoratively referred to now as “heteronormativity” and viewed as virtually discriminatory to assert this. Court cases are now being lost by those in the United States who adhere firmly to this basic principle of Catholic teaching.

The deep and abiding pushback against this teaching is so fierce precisely becauseacknowledging a singular “sexuality” fully undermines all assertions of identity based on “sexualities.”  In this context, “sexualities” is to “sexuality” as “Protestant” is to “Catholic”—to claim that my “sexuality” is different from the one ordered to conjugal love is to make a clear protest against a longstanding reality and to expect that longstanding reality to simply stop being what it is just because you’re protesting against it. But that’s just not how God’s plan for us actually works. The fact that there are “Protestants” doesn’t change the reality that the Catholic Church remains One, Holy, Catholic, and Apostolic. Similarly, the fact that people adhere to a pluraldefinition of “sexualities” does not change the awesome truth of God’s plan for creating us male and female and uniting man and woman in marriage via our sexual identity—not as “gay” or “straight”—but as male and female.

Pope St. John Paul II, in his Theology of the Body, spends much time in teaching the essential importance of self-mastery and of every human person’s responsibility to discern whether each and every experience of our “sexuality” is truly something to be willed as being in keeping with authentic purity of heart. In simpler terms, this means that every one of us must interiorly examine every sexual urge, sexual impulse, sexual feeling, sexual desire, sexual attraction —whatever one wants to call it—to determine whether it’s in keeping with authentic purity of heart. How do we determine this? We need to ask whether this or that sexual feeling, in our immediate and concrete circumstances, is or is not properly ordered toward the conjugal love of man and woman—regardless of whether we’re married or not. We can only willingly say “yes” to those sexual impulses, attractions, desires, etc., that are truly ordered toward married love. Anything other than this is an experience of “sexuality” that is not a “truly human” experience.

If I’m married and I experience a surge of sexual attraction toward someone other than my spouse, I’m called to say “no” to that experience. If unmarried, I’m called to say “yes” only to those sexual attractions that, in accord with God’s plan, are there to potentially move me closer toward fully-realized conjugal love with the very person toward whom I experience that attraction.

And let’s not delude ourselves into thinking that we can define such “sexual” attractions as merely those experiences of “desire” for something physical or “biological”—above, Pope St. John Paul II makes it clear that “sexuality” concerns the innermost being of the human person “as such” (as human!) and cannot be reduced to the biological. This means that those sexual attractions that are not directly “physical” must still be examined in our hearts to determine whether they are indeed ordered toward conjugal love, or not. In other words, “sexuality” is not reducible to “whether I want to have sexual relations with” this or that person. Sexuality is rather God’s way of drawing together a man and a woman for that uniquely permanent, exclusive, free, total, faithful, and fruitful communion of persons we call marriage. Sexuality is about that full reality, not just about the “physical” part.

So, courageous readers, how did you do on this short Catholic quiz? Let me know by leaving a comment! And be encouraged—we can stand fast, together, despite the torrents of opposition. Let’s continue to pray for the many in our culture and the many of our fellow Catholics who are still struggling to see this simple truth about “sexuality” as a beautiful shining light in God’s plan for us.

The Proper Response is Not a Reaction

"Did you know that if you buy the book, you can get a coupon for 7.00 off the movie ticket?"

"No one in my family is seeing that movie."

"I hear that it's less intense than the book."

"Well, no one in my family is reading the book either. It's trash."

Uncomfortable silence.....

This was the exchange that took place yesterday evening between a young lady checking us out at Target, and myself, after someone behind me in line mentioned the book "50 Shades of Grey".
 The more I think about it, the more I wish that I could go back and do it over.
Why am I so quick to react, instead of taking a minute to think and respond instead?

I could have said any number of things.
"I haven't read it. It seems really demeaning toward women, especially young women."

I could have asked her a question.
"I don't know, do women really want men to treat them way the main character is treated? Is that what women really want from relationships?"

She probably thought that it was a safe topic. The book is all the rage. Everyone is reading it and looking forward to seeing the movie. It's become pop culture, and it has young women feeling "well read" if they can discuss it.

Crafting a response to encourage a conversation would have so much better.
I had an opportunity and I blew it.
I feel so strongly sometimes, that I just open my mouth and shut people down, but that is certainly not the way Jesus would do it.
Here I am, a few days away from Lent, trying to figure out how best to use those forty days.
I think the Holy Spirit is knocking on my heart, but I need a concrete way to pray and sacrifice that will hone my reactions into loving responses.
I will be praying a Novena before Lent, and I am praying that I will be given a formula of prayer and action that will set me on the road to better discipleship.
It's one of those things I can't do by myself.

January 2015

 Just a bunch of photos of the month, for the record! 

FaceBook has stolen so much of my blogging attention, but here is a photgraphic representation of this time. 

Paul playing Baskeball for the Homeschool League- Coach Joe, Sam, Mark, Kevin

We love you #4!

Sterling and Autumn- 6 mos

March For Life! Tim, Paul, Patrick, Tommy, Bishop Malooly

Cooke's and a Lilly in the tub in Ft Worth house

2015 Youth Mass

Love My Town!

Tydings Park Boat Launch

Welcome to the Hotel West Virginia

Well, yeah, it's been awhile since I have blogged.
It seems like it's been longer actually, because so much has happened since I blogged last, but I'm not going to try to write an update. I'm just going to jump in again, starting with a story that I have to get down in writing while it's still fresh in my mind.

Julia was coming home for her break, for All Saint's Day, and so John and I decided to go pick her up.
It is a pretty easy drive, and I have been wanting to see the Franciscan campus.
John just wanted to see Julia.
So I thought that I had better find a place to stay in the area.
I looked on Expedia, and went through all the available options.
A lot of the rooms were more than I wanted to pay, but most of those were places that we have stayed before, and been happy with. I did find one place that had a single room for 60.00 and sounded really cool!
It had great reviews, and the pictures online were just amazing. The story was so interesting.
It is called the Aspen Manor Resort. You have to look at the website to see why I was so taken by the chance to stay there. I was thinking that I was going to be able to experience local history, and soak up the warmth of old woodwork and antiques. I was looking forward to the amazing views and walking through the chapel.
I had no idea what a totally bizarre experience it would be, just to check in. I am still shaking my head...

We were running a little late, but I had spoken to someone a couple of days before to confirm my reservation. I wanted to call and just let them know that I would be checking in a little on the late side, but there was no answer just a recording that said that their office hours were 8:00 to 5:00 and if this was an emergency (emergency?) to call this other number. Well, it wasn't an emergency, but I thought it a little odd that there wouldn't be someone to pick up the phone.
I dropped John at the college so that he and Julia could spend some time together while I went to check in.
I had to drive back across the river into West Virginia to get on the right road, and then I had to drive about five miles through a couple of very tired little steel towns. The neighborhood looked pretty rough, but I turned off the main road and up a gated driveway. The driveway was very dark and the road was winding and bumpy. It was about a mile to the place where you could start to see signs of habitation. The places that I could see looked rather shabby and worn, maybe they were caretakers homes or something. I got to the main building, and I must have been at the back, because it looked nothing like what I saw in the pictures. At all.
I went into the "lobby" which was really just a hallway with a desk in a recessed area. It really looked pretty thrown together.
I looked for someone to check me in, but there was just a sign on the desk with a number to call, so I called it. A male voice said that he would be right down.
 I was looking around and wondering where all the antiques were. This hallway and reception area looked pretty institutional and a lot like an old run down nursing home, which, as it turns out, it was. When the guy got there he seemed to be a bit confused about where to put me, and whether or not he was going to be able to find a clean room. My concern was growing as I looked around and really couldn't recognize anything that looked like what I had seen on the website. The guy finally found a key to the room that he said was reserved for us, but when we got to it, after wandering down several twists and turns and hallways, he turned right around and said "No, this won't work." and when I looked around behind him to see what the problem was, I could see that in the bathroom the toilet was lying in pieces. Back up to the front desk, through nursing home halls painted a calming pinkish beige. Past several "guests" that looked like they might possibly just live there, and well, just made me rather uncomfortable. It was like everyone there knew each other and I was kind of a curiosity. I'm not kidding, it was like a very odd dream.
When the "concierge" finally found a key to a room that was apparently going to suit us, we traced that long hallway once more and as we were passing through one of the sitting areas I saw a guy standing over a table covered with magazines, peering at them intently. I was shown into a room with two twin beds and a bath with a "shared" shower. "Oh, but you don't have to worry, no one is in the other room." Umm....yeah.
So, we left the room, and my bad feeling just kept getting worse. I looked at the table that had held so much interest for the guy that was loitering in the halls. He was gone, but on the table were at least a dozen "GQ" magazines, just the type of reading material that I want my son walking past on his way to our room. I took the key from the guy, and he promptly disappeared. I had pretty much made up my mind that I was going to have to find another place for us to stay, even sleeping in the FUS Chapel on a pew would be fine.
I called Tim and told him what I had just seen, and he said to just write it off and try to find a room in another hotel. There was Hampton Inn about a block from the college, and I walked into the lobby at about 10:30. God is good. The place was clean, friendly, and they had a nice double room on the ground floor. The doors were all on the inside.
I didn't even care about the price tag, and they did give me a pretty good discount. I think the guy at the desk felt sorry for me.
I still had the key from the other place, so I went back to the school, picked up John and Julia, and we all drove out the the Aspen Manor Resort, where I got out of the car for about 30 seconds, ran inside, threw the key on the desk, and ran back to the car.
I wish I had taken pictures....

Welcome to the Family!

On Halloween weekend, two new little kitties were added to the family.
John has been wanting another cat for awhile, and his girlfriend Julia is such a cat person, that it seemed like a good idea.
As it turns out, it was.
We looked around and found a rescue that had a sibling pair looking for a home.
They are a male, Sterling, and a female, Autumn.
They are settling in very well and making themselves right at home.

Sterling

Autumn