The Lies of Our Times

I think one of the biggest lies that our culture has perpetrated on it's youth is the idea that:
 "You can do anything if you just want it bad enough!"
How many times, in our youth and school years, did we hear "It's only a matter of making up your mind. If you want to, you can be an astronaut, an engineer, or even the president!" OK well, considering the caliber of recent administrations, anyone probably can be president.
The question is, why are we telling children that they can do anything, and at the same time diagnosing them with every kind of learning problem, mental health issue and personality disorder we can think of? You got your label? Great! Now, tell us what you want to do with your life and we will find some way to accommodate your limitations and get you the help you need so that we can shove your square little hiney into that round hole. Why not just go find a square hole?


There are people that can run a marathon in record time. There are people that can run a marathon in a day. There are people that can run. I am not one of them. I can tell myself that I can all day long, but I can't. I have bad hips and knees.
I can't do higher math. That's OK. I get to a certain point and it starts to sound like Swahili. I think I could learn Swahili, but there is something in my brain that inhibits my ability to learn math. I don't think God is disappointed, after all, He made me this way. He obviously had a plan and higher Math wasn't a part of it.

Tim would have loved to have been a pilot. He has the aptitude and tons of desire, but he also has terrible eyesight and vertigo. Fact.
The things that we can't do don't define us, they direct us toward the things that we actually have been given, our gifts.
Telling students that they can "do anything" really doesn't mean "do anything". It leaves them feeling like they are expected to shoot for Wall street or the White House and then if that doesn't work out they can teach or become a landscaper. What if they already know that they would LOVE teaching or landscaping? Are their gifts less worthy because they didn't attempt the highest peak and shoot for the top first? What's wrong with just shooting for the best version of yourself from the beginning?

What happens in a classroom when a person with intellectual or physical limitations hears the teacher telling the class, "If you want it, you can do it!", whatever "it" is? What if you just can't? It's OK not to be that high academic achiever or athlete. What's not OK is to drive yourself for the dreams of someone else or because "it" has to be attempted before you can settle down and find where you fit. If you want it, try it. If you can't get there, try something else. Life is too short to buy into other people's ideas of what your life should look like. Follow your dreams, within the bounds of your capabilities, but don't beat yourself up because you have to modify the dream. Try, yes. Try as hard as you can, and when you feel that you have tried yourself out, try something else. And don't bring up Rudy Ruteger because he tried as hard as he could, and he did play one awesome football game, but then went out and did what he's really good at, motivating people.

We do live in a land of opportunity, but one of the most beautiful things about our country is what the old-timers called "Yankee Ingenuity". Genius is not defined by IQ, but by the ability to find, develop and use the gifts that we have been given to their true purpose. You might be a math genius and win a Nobel prize for Science. Awesome. You might be a literary genius, and write a Nobel prize-winning novel. Fantastic. What if you are a people genius? You might not win a Nobel prize, but your contribution is no less brilliant. You have to ability to motivate and move others in ways that a math genius could never figure out. We need you!

Don't get caught up in the lie that you can do anything if you just want it bad enough, because while you are trying to figure out how to achieve the impossible dream, you might miss the thing that makes you truly happy. It's not enough to want it, it has to be meant for you, and the One who made you is the One who has the perfect plan for you. Ask Him, He'll tell you!

2013- Positive and Personal

It is now a few days into the new year, and it appears that
 (a) The world will go on for a least a while longer.
 (b) The economy is going to limp along as opposed to crashing over the cliff.
 (c) There is not a darn thing that I can do about either of those very large issues.

However, there is a lot that I can do about my own attitudes and direction.
I think that it is just too easy to let the big stuff become the focus and to let the things that we need to work on get lost in the shuffle.

That being said, this new year is going to be one with much less attention paid to the big picture, and more to the interior and domestic side of life.

We have so many blessings in our lives. We have a home, Tim has a job that enables me not only to keep us all fed and clothed, but allows for us to help others as well.
We are able to teach our kids at home and let them learn at their own pace. We are also able to pass to them the truths of our Faith, so that they can accept the heritage of the Catholic Faith in it's fullness.

So we are going to do a lot more soul searching and appreciating this year. We are going to be more thankful for what we have. We are going to look at the beauty and let God's voice speak through His creation.
I am going to try to be more positive and not let the little things annoy me as much.
I am trying to spend more time in prayer and Bible study. I have discovered the Psalms in a much more personal way, through our Parish Bible Study group. We are doing the Ascension Press study Psalms, the School of Prayer. It is so wonderful to find God waiting for me each day in this wonderful book.

This is the year of Faith and I am trying to make this the year of my Faith, and my family's Faith.

At this time we are all healthy, we have two beautiful new baby boys in the Cooke household, Nina is well on her way at work and school, the details of each day are manageable and we have every reason to look forward to the future.

The Road to Hell...Is Paved With Millstones

I am not in the habit of posting diatribes or rants anymore.
All of that was just taking too much energy, and I have been trying to work towards a more positive and persuasive blog, with mostly family posts.
However, recently I have found that I am thinking an awful lot about some issues that I am afraid  I just can't ignore, because they are being ignored by the very people that need to be bringing them to light.

I read this post a few days ago...Hurts and Hopes, By Monsignor Charles Pope, a very special priest that I greatly admire and respect. His post states his concern with the lack of belief in the very real possibility that a whole lot of people are on the way to an eternal destination that is going to be, shall we say, less than optimal. This one of his many points is, I think, a very important one.

Devastating – It does not require an advanced degree in sociology to understand that, to remove the unambiguous biblical teaching on the very real and possible outcome of Hell, is to remove strong motivation to seek a Savior and salvation. It is therefore no surprise that as the teaching on Hell has been largely set aside by the modern world, that recourse to the sacraments, prayer, Church attendance and any number of spiritual remedies have suffered significant declines during the same period.

He is responding, in his article, to comments made by another priest that I respect and admire, Fr Robert Barron.

In his recent critique of Ralph Martin’s book, Fr. Barron states his fundamental objection to Martin’s reiteration of Church teaching and of Lumen Gentium 16. In effect Barron references Spe Salvi, 45-47 wherein Pope Benedict seems to suppose that few are in Hell and that the great majority of humanity will ultimately be saved.

Father Barron concludes,

It seems to me that Pope Benedict’s position — affirming the reality of Hell but seriously questioning whether that the vast majority of human beings end up there — is the most tenable and actually the most evangelically promising.

Now, it is not my place to question or criticize either one of these men. Both are very qualified theologians and both are people that I believe are concerned with the culture and the times that we face. 

What I feel needs to be said, however, is that we don't have the luxury, in this day and age, to assume that many sheep in the fold are going to go looking for the Shepherd. Many of them have very happily gone through the gate and off to frolic with the wolves, with no interest in the Shepherd and His desire for them to follow Him. If the love of Christ isn't enough to bring people to their spiritual senses, then the fear of Hell may be the only thing that can bring them back.

Now I know that it's unfashionable and downright mean to make people aware of their sin and it's consequences. It makes them unhappy and burdens them with responsibility. That's just no way to go through life. 

This makes the position of a parish pastor one that is either unpopular or disingenuous. As a rule, people don't tend to take the road less traveled voluntarily, and they tend to balk at being told that they are on the wrong path. So what is a pastor to do? As the Spiritual father of a parish full of children that don't want to hear the hard truth, isn't it just better to get them in the door some Sundays and make them feel like they are doing all they need to do to be "good" Catholics? 

Well, it may be more comfortable on this side of the end times, but isn't it more responsible to make them aware of the possibility of damnation? If you have a child, and you take them to the doctor, and the doctor says, "Well, I'm not sure, but I think it's possible that this child has a deadly form of cancer. It may not really be what it looks like. It may just turn out to be a cold." Isn't it the parent's gut feeling to do everything possible to find out, and take measures to ensure the best chance for a long life? Isn't it that "pit-of-the-stomach" fear of loss that motivates the parent to seek whatever is necessary, no matter how painful or difficult it turns out to be? What kind of parent says "Oh, well I don't really think that that kind of cancer exists, and even if it does, I don't want to make my child uncomfortable, so we'll just go home and eat ice cream and play video games. Maybe he'll just get over it on his own." 

We live in a spiritually cancerous culture. Every single soul in our society is living the spiritual equivalent of a two-pack-a-day smoker. Isn't it more urgent than ever to make people aware of the risks to their spiritual health? 

Death due to cancer is a horrible way to end life. It is painful and undignified and ugly, but it can be redemptive. Death for eternity would really suck. No chance of anything but pain and ugliness. Forever. That is truly terrifying.